Hello friends!
As of a few days ago, I am FULLY FUNDED! Isn’t that incredible?! Directly seeing and receiving God’s provision through other people’s generosity is such an amazing experience. To all the strangers, friends, and clients: THANK YOU! I pray that your obedience is blessed.
While thinking about what to write on this post (besides thank you) I decided to go to the very beginning. I had been living in the world and completely ignorant about anything of God until mid-September of last year (2020). That’s when I really met Jesus for the first time and experienced the supernatural transformation of a new heart and being saved from my path down the ‘wide road’. The other night I was going through the dates, and I stumbled upon this text I sent to a mentor early November 2020 that was truly the genesis of my journey with World Race:
“hey, I have been super conflicted these last few months and honestly stressed. its all been because of college. i don’t know where i should go, what i should do, swim or not, christian college or not, or even if i should! I was praying about it while writing a application letter just yesterday(first time in too long honestly) and i got this overwhelming, undeniable word that i need to go on a gap-year missions trip. I Have multiple college and scholarship essays due in a few days and i have just been dreading my future honestly.
I feel like im being forced into this by expectations to spend four years of my life and come out in debt and still confused. idk. But i really, really feel like that this is what i should do! for the first time, im certain about something in my future.
i think that it would be a perfect fit for me in every way and i know that need to get off this rock(Sitka) and drop this privilege and materialism and I would gain so much. I dont think that I have ever looked forward to something this much in terms of plans after graduation, usually when I even think of the future I awaken this big anxiety.
I right away searched up “gap year missions trip” and this organization called WorldRace came up first and I think that it captures pretty much everything I saw in my mind. Now Im just doing research and praying for more clarity but I truly believe that God told me to go do this next school-year. Do you have any input or thoughts or advice??”
A few days after this, I applied and got accepted into World Race Gap Year. My excitement was still very much present, but this new threatening shadow loomed over me.
Fundraising.
Not only a couple hundred like I had always done for various sports my whole life, but nearly $16,000. Though this time, I had someone on my side unlike anyone I had ever known. I now had this God that was eager to share His good plans with me and who gave me the Holy Spirit to guide me. I had met a father who provides for His children more than any worldly father could.
And I didn’t just hear this from someone else or from a flimsy thought or through gullible emotions. I KNEW it. I could FEEL it with a deep certainty I had never known. I now knew that the God of the bible was real, and is exactly everything He says He is.
Now, I can’t say that I walked close to God the whole way. I fell–so much–but each time I saw Jesus’s hand extended, waiting for me to reach out and grab hold to help me back up. Looking back, I see the fault in my thinking. “If I just work harder and spend more time sending letters, I will be rewarded with more donations, right?”
When I thought that way, I opened the door to let the same old dread and fear come slithering in. “What if what you do isn’t good enough and you don’t get there?” The truth is, what I do will NEVER be good enough. That’s why I need to cling so close to my provider, who already has done SO MUCH MORE than enough—through Jesus hanging on the cross.
God didn’t ask me to fundraise, He asked me to trust him. That meant telling that person about the good news, it meant opening up to that stranger about my testimony and my new journey. He blesses obedience to Him, not works of ourselves. I think my good friend Megan says it well on her own blog:
“Romans 9:15-16: ‘For he says to Moses, I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion. It does not, therefore, depend on human desire or effort, but on God’s mercy.’
Paul writes a simple but very important truth. God’s blessings are NOT doled out based on our desire or effort but by his amazing MERCY and COMPASSION. When we allow ourselves to believe our effort is what earns us God’s favor, then out of selfishness we either react through pride or shame.”
Through the eight months of fundraising, I learned that God is the steward of all resources that we gain, and that what we often think is ours never was.
I learned to hold my own finances loosely, and to be so, so grateful when someone else did the same.
I learned how to shift my perspective to see obstacles as opportunities for growth, and I pray that I won’t forget these lessons.
Thank you so much for reading and donating! Subscribe to get an email update when I post!
All the Love,
Grace
PS. check out my friend Megan’s new blog! Her posts are so wise. ( WanderWonderWilder.com/jesuslovesyou )
PPS. now that I am fully funded, please cancel any scheduled monthly donations through AIM! If you feel led, I am still accepting donations personally that I am using to help buy supplies!( ie tents, backpacks, handheld fans… this pale Alaskan is going to struggle a bit in South Africa!)
